Shaken
by QueenoftheBlackOrder
Summary: 2 years before Allen came to the Order, Lenalee, Lavi, and the Treefire team have a problem. Yuu Kanda was a torture victim for an unknown organization. Can Lenalee and Lavi return Kanda to his regular state, or will we have a big problem when we hit first manga?
1. Chapter 1

**A.N. This came to me in the middle of the night while I was 'sleeping'. I thought, what would happen if Kanda was a torture victim before Allen came to the Order? And if Lavi and Lenalee found him, when they visited some section of the Black Order. WARNING: Many of the characters in this will not have any good reason of being there, so if their personalities change, I'm sorry. **

**The section of the Order where Lenalee and Lavi are I call Treefire, don't kill me, I think it sounds cool. There are three main characters that are basically OCs, there is Hikaru, a shy Japanese girl who works with the security systems and such. And Eric, a boy who works with a power source called, the Akuma. Has some faults like ways of finding out answers. Oh, and then, there is Rebecca, a girl who Lavi is fond of, and gets jealous very easily.**

**Lavi is going to be flirty, warning in general.**

**Oh, and Kanda, is going to be a torture victim, just plain out angsty.**

**I give you, shaken.**

**Disclaimer: I only own the OCs. The rest is pure D. Gray-Man.**

Lavi groaned while sitting on his desk, his head fell towards the desk, shaking it. The quaking had spilt Rebecca's coffee. But Lavi didn't care, he was having "Rebecca Trouble". Rebecca was jealous of Lenalee, even though Lavi told her time and time again that nothing was going on. Rebecca, Lenalee, Hikaru, and Eric were all in the room next to him, they were looking into strange energy spikes coming from the Akuma. A power source they had here at Treefire, which occasionally spit out useful stuff that Lavi and the team would have to look into, test, and stuff. Rebecca left with only a "Bye sir," Lavi was left hurt, because he knew when Rebecca went formal, she was mad, no, fuming.

For some strange reason, the stuff that fell out of the Akuma, the only one who could quickly identify it was Kanda. That made it much easier for them to work.

"Lavi!" Eric's voice echoed through the empty halls, "A spaceship is landing, and we don't know who it is!"

Lavi's head instantly detached from the table, who could it be? No. It couldn't be him, could it? Could it really be Kanda's ship?

When Kanda got mad, he went into his room and wasn't seen for a long time. One time, Lavi made Kanda really mad, and then followed him to his room. Instead of storing things like clothes in his closet, Kanda had a bronze jar like thing, and stepped right inside it, yes, it was big enough for that, Lavi had followed him and then helped him with his broodings. He got the shock of his life when he and Kanda started flying missions for the Order in it.

The bronze jar appeared in the middle of Treefire, he Lavi couldn't help but grin. Finally! Help with the Akuma!

"What's that?" Eric pointed his weapon at the jar, Rebecca, Hikaru, and Lenalee had their weapons out too, they didn't know what it was.

"Oh, come on guys. Don't worry. This is a friend." Lavi looked towards the door.

After a while, he frowned, Kanda usually came right out, either in the I-surrender pose, or the I-dare-you-to-shoot-me one. Usually the second one. Sighing, he took off the key that Kanda had given him to the door, and entered. "Be right back." he told the rest of the team.

Naturally, Lavi knew something was wrong, Kanda was lying on the ground, his face was pale. In his hand was a packet. It was a packet used for people to get over an alcoholic addiction. Kanda had always secretly been allergic to the stuff. _God, Kanda. Why would you do that?_

Lavi strode over to him and picked the unconscious Kanda up, cradling him against his chest. He felt frail against Lavi's body, like he would snap if you put too much pressure on him. And he was lighter than a human his age should be...

Lenalee drew her breath when she saw the deadweight Kanda Lavi was holding in his arms. She didn't know what to do, everyone could see that. Kanda was supposed to be the strong one who was always there, but now...

"Who is that?" Rebecca asked.

"A friend," Lavi answered, Lenalee nodded, vigorously. He turned to Eric, no need for his teammates to find out that Kanda wasn't your everyday exorcist, he was a second, that's different. And they haven't met any good different exorcists. "Eric, fix a medical wing, we need to find out what's wrong with him.

Without further wait, Lavi laid Kanda down on the bed as gently as he possibly could. His pulse was still double, a side effect from his regenerative seal, but it was slower than usual. Lavi decided it was an aftereffect of the packet Kanda took. But why would Kanda take it if he knew the consequences? He took the packet out of his pocket, and sighed in relief when he found that only one of the many pills was missing. That would only be enough to make Kanda ill, two would kill him.

Lavi took off Kanda's jacket, which looked terribly hot, his shirt, etc. but for once without any dirty thoughts circling that mind of his. He gasped, Kanda had three ginormous gashes on his chest. He could see that they needed work, and _fast_.

"Eric!" Lavi called. After two impatient minutes, and Eric's grumbling about something like 'Eric do this, Eric do that,'. Eric's eyes widened when he saw Kanda's injuries.

"Go and explain what we know to Lenalee, Hikaru, and Rebecca, I'll fix this." Eric took out a tray full of antiseptics, sedatives, bandages, etc.

Lavi's eyes widened when he saw a packet of the alcoholic stuff on the tray, and promptly told him never to use it.

Lenalee, Hikaru, and Rebecca were all sitting outside, Lavi could tell they were confused. Well, Lenalee was less confused, but still, confused.

"That boy in there, is 16, and is Lenalee and I's friend." Lavi told them all.

"Does he have something to do with when you went missing?" Rebecca demanded. That was the time he and Kanda were in the bronze jar/spaceship.

"He's a good boy," Lavi nodded, Lenalee looked at him sternly, he was trying to make Kanda sound like a dog, "Just trust me on that, he's just not the most stable of all people at the this moment. Whatever you do, do _not _let him near that bronze jar, okay?" After feeling satisfied when scanning their faces, he went back to Kanda's side. Lavi wasn't the person to leave a friend, even if that friend does threaten him with a katana.

Kanda was lying on the bed, he had a gauze wrapped around his chest and head. His face was contorted with pain and was very, _very _pale. Lavi couldn't help but shudder, he had never seen Kanda like this before. Kanda, who always hid his emotions from everyone, you had no clue what was going on inside his head. Bookman and himself had trouble too.

"The head?" Lavi asked Eric. He hadn't noticed any head wounds when picking him up.

"Bruising," Eric replied, but when he saw Lavi's face, he continued, "minor."

Lavi pulled a chair up next to the bed, grabbed one of Kanda's hands, wincing at how cold it was. He knew that his regenerative seal allowed him to go to lower body temperatures than regular people, but his hand was like holding onto an ice cube. Lavi gripped it tightly, trying to restore whatever heat he could manage.

Lavi lost track of all time when he was with Kanda. His mind began to wander, though he always kept a watchful eye on Kanda. He thought back to all the times he had seen Kanda before he had become an exorcist. The first time they met was in the Second Exorcist Program, the whole deal with Alma Karma hadn't made Kanda go like this. Something truly bad, no, truly terrible must've happened to make the most stable and solid person in the Order go to this.

Lavi jumped up when he heard movement behind him. He crouched protectively over the unmoving Kanda, he had no idea why. But it was only Lenalee.

"Sorry," Lavi looked apologetically at Lenalee, who moved and sat beside him, careful not to move the bed more than need be.

"You really care for him, don't you?" she said, but it wasn't a question. She knew it was a cold, solid fact.

"Kanda, he helped me become who I am today, he helped make me a better person." Lavi answered, Lenalee's eyes widened with surprise. Sure Kanda might be cold and calculating, but he helped Lavi get rid of his old attitude, effectively making him more like Alma Karma.

Lenalee nodded, glancing down at Kanda's unconscious form, "He'll being alright," she wasn't just speaking to Lavi when she said that.

"He has to be,"

A small moan could be heard by Lenalee and Lavi. They both turned towards Kanda. He was writhing in the covers, whimpering. Lavi stroked his long hair for a bit, whispering soothing words in Kanda's ear. At first Kanda rolled away from the sound but eventually calmed down. When the Baka known more commonly as Kanda rolled over, he also winced when he aggravated his injuries. Lavi pushed him back into the stance he used to have. Lenalee laid a hand on his forehead before Lavi could stop her, she drew it back in shock.

"Lavi! He's absolutely freezing!" Lenalee looked like she was on panic mode.

Lavi laughed, but it was a sad laugh, a laugh empty without happiness, "That's normal for him, well, kind of."

Lenalee stared Lavi down for a minute before turning back to Kanda, "You need to eat something, Lavi."

Lavi waved her off, "Not hungry,"

Lenalee shook her head, "I'll ask Rebecca to make you some coffee." she exited as fast as she came in. Lavi sighed in defeat, he hoped Rebecca still wasn't angry at him.

Later, no Rebecca came, just Lenalee. Rebecca obviously hadn't forgiven him yet. Lenalee set the coffee tray down, and walked over with a flannel. "Eric said he might need it," she explained while mopping the sweat off Kanda's head.

Kanda's dark blue eyes snapped open for a second, and Lenalee and Lavi paled visibly at the raw pain that were in them. They rested on Lenalee's face and he said, "No! I'm b-" the rest of his sentence was lost when he fell back into the state of unconsciousness, his breathing was ragged. Lavi put a hand on Kanda's arm, but he flinched away.

Lenalee sent a questioning look in Lavi's direction. Lavi shrugged, "He's done that before, no one knows why." Lavi began to worry, had Kanda hurt everytime he touched him. **(A.N. Or did he put a hand on an injury, read to find out!) **Kanda, being the martyr, probably just suffered in silence.

"Shh..." Lavi tucked Kanda back into the bed, careful not to touch any bare skin, "Hush now, don't worry, I'm not going to hurt you."

"No, no! Lavi..." Kanda's voice faded.

"Shush," Lavi looked stern, "Sleep."

It took Kanda a week of either sedated or natural sleep to actually wake up. Lavi spent most of that time worrying that Kanda's chest wasn't healing like the regenerative seal wasn't working. It had only gotten a little worse due to the constant rolling away from visitors. And then there was the problem of Rebecca, Lenalee, Eric, and Hikaru had accepted Kanda as part of Treefire. Rebecca was giving Kanda the cold shoulder. Which was unfair considering Kanda did nothing wrong.

Lavi sighed, so many problems. Why must his life be so messed up? Why! He fell on his knees dramatically.

**A.N. Hello there! This is a very serious fanfiction, just for a warning, I'm not planning on this being roll over on the floor funny. But later, I might do Allen's reaction to reading the fanfiction, I'm not sure, that should be funnier, or just like insert widening eyes here.**

**Review, please!**


	2. Chapter 2

**A.N. Here's chapter two! **

**So, I reread my chapter last night, and I didn't get the whole bronze jar business, so I'm going to mention it as little as possible, yeah?**

**Please review! Good or bad, I need to know!**

**Disclaimer: I only own some of the Treefire team. The rest are D. Gray-Man characters.**

"Lavi!" Eric's voice echoed throughout Treefire, "Kanda's up now! I thought you might want to be the first one to see him!"

Lavi didn't reply, he didn't need to. He had already pushed the medic out of his way to get to Kanda's room. He heard him before he saw him. Muffled cries of panic, pain, etc. were coming from the direction, Lavi sprinted the rest of the way.

"Kanda," Lavi looked around the room. Kanda was hugging his knees to his chest, trying to make himself as small as possible, in the corner.

"Kanda!" Lavi sat himself down on the bed, then faced Kanda, looking him strait in the eyes. Kanda was shaking, his dark blue eyes were filled with fear, like he was planning some way to sprint from the room if need be. Slowly, Lavi got off the bed, and made his way over to Kanda.

He doesn't know what made him do it, everything in his body was screaming at him, 'No! This is a bad idea! Are you even listening to me?' Lavi raised his own arms, offering out a hug, I know, crazy. This is Kanda. But all he did was flinch away, Lavi could only imagine what had happened to him.

"Kanda, I wouldn't hurt you, I swear on that." Lavi scooted closer and gathered the unwilling Kanda in his long, strong arms. For the next few seconds, Kanda was silent, but then he curled himself into a ball, and began to sob. Kanda's long fingers clutched Lavi's exorcist uniform for dear life, his long eyelashes were filled with tears, one was trailing down his face.

"Shush," Lavi, rocked Kanda back and forth, his heart was shocked, but slightly pleased with this vulnerable and frankly, adorable side of his friend, or however you think about them. After a long time, Lavi asked a simple question, "What happened?"

Wrong question. Kanda immediately stiffened, as if he was made of solid rock. Kanda obviously wasn't at all ready for that question, every fiber of Lavi's body burned with guilt. "It's okay," Lavi chanted and resumed his rocking.

"Do you want something to eat, Kanda?" Lavi asked. He already teased Kanda for his already skinny frame, but he was more of that, he looked, starved. He was so fragile...

Kanda's royal blue eyes found Lavi's emerald one, and he opened his mouth. No sound came out. Kanda blinked quickly, he probably didn't trust himself to speak, actually, it was pretty obvious.

"Righty then, I'll just go now." Lavi began to stand up, but couldn't. Kanda's grasp on him tightened and his eyes filled again with fear, "Okay, then..."

"Hikaru!" Lavi yelled over his shoulder, Kanda flinched back from the sudden loud noise.

Hikaru entered the room holding a piece of what looked to be a computer.

"We've found some new energy spikes..." Hikaru was silenced by a hand.

"Do you think you could get someth-" Lavi stopped because Kanda had fallen asleep in his arms. "Nothing." Lavi put Kanda as gently as humanly possible back onto the bed, then aimlessly threw some blankets on him and tucked him in.

"You might as well show me, can I conclude these spikes are from the Akuma?"

The pair exited the room and made their way to a computer screen, Hikaru pointed to a computer screen, "There's been more activity with the Akuma recently. I thought that it was just some disturbance in the electrical problems we've been having, but that wasn't it. Let me pull up this screen...Here! If you looked at the spikes from this month they're seemingly forming a pattern. It's been going on for a month now, so it's too long for coincidence, and it's like something's trying to enter..."

"Kanda is currently are first problem, yeah?" Lavi flinched at his poor choice of words.

"I wouldn't call him a problem, Lavi," she looked around, "You should go speak to Rebecca. She's been feeling really down, I know the poor timing, but you still should go check up on her."

"Alright." Lavi walked away. Man, what was happening to his clever, flirty, bookmanesce comments. Maybe he was spending too much time around moapy people.

Rebecca was in the kitchen. Making one of her fabulous cups of coffee.

"Hello, beautiful," Lavi sashayed up to the counter, he looked ridiculous.

Rebecca didn't respond, she just nodded politely in his general direction. Lavi tried a different approach at all of this, with out the flirty stuff, you know? "Rebecca, I don't know why your acting so strange, but can you just tell me and we can work it out..."

"You don't know?" Rebecca yelled, "You don't know. Maybe, it's because everyday you bring someone new into Treefire, leaving me for second best. Nice Rebecca, she wouldn't mind, would she?"

"Rebecca, listen," Lavi was interrupted.

"No! Lavi, you listen just this once, I'm tired of being the one to turn to once the other person had left!" Rebecca finished, all her anger suddenly drained from her face, she just stared at the floor, obviously trying to shoo Lavi.

"Rebecca, their is nothing going on with Lenalee, or Kanda," how weird would that be, Lavi thought, "Rebecca, it's exactly like you to get jealous over a little thing like that. I don't know how things are working out, so let's talk about it later. Kanda's in trouble, and Treefire might not survive without him."

"And it will survive without me." Rebecca looked miserable.

Yes-no-can we talk this over a cup of coffee?" Smooth, Lavi, smooth.

"Kanda," Lavi began, with his bookman knowledge he was one of the only people who knew much on the topic, "Isn't like you and me, not a regular exorcist. People call him 'Second Exorcist' or 'the Second'." Lavi was gritting his teeth, waiting for Rebecca's reaction, unknown to him, was the fact that Eric was listening from behind the door as well.

"I thought so when I noticed the regenerative seal," Eric stepped out from his hiding spot, "He might be the Second Exorcist, Lavi, but currently, he looks like a living heck." Eric always had a thing against cursing. "Can we trust Kanda? He's weak and unprotected now, seems harmless as a fly. But you know how good at acting those things the Order makes are."

"I trust the boy with my life," Lavi was the only one who knew Kanda's real age, currently he looked 16, but was really 6, "I always have and will."

Rebecca was staring blankly into space, "You okay?" Lavi waved a hand in front of her face.

"Figures," she was very upset, "You'd like some alien over me."

"First of all," Lavi explained, "He's not an alien."

"Are you going to tell Lenalee?" Eric butted in.

"How would she react?" Lavi thought of all the little things Lenalee had been doing for Kanda, would she stop? He knew Lenalee, but still, you can't be too careful.

"She won't mind at all," Rebecca mumbled, "She completely maternal over him already." Lavi smiled, that was so Lenalee. But Kanda sometimes had that effect on people, conscious or not.

"When Kanda's better," Lavi decided, "And don't tell anyone. All we need is another branch of the Order or Treefire getting all in this."

Everyone nodded.

"Eric! Lavi! Rebecca!" Lenalee burst into the room, "Come quick! Kanda has broke out in spasms!"

**A.N. So sorry there was so little Kanda Whump in this chapter. It was more of a connecting chapter, but way more is coming up, just you believe it.**

**Should I break up Lavi and Rebecca, it could go either way at this moment!**

**Review!**


	3. Chapter 3

**A.N. Another chapter! By the way, I've got multiple stories going at once, so if you're worrying that I'm not continuing some, I just personally love working on this one, I feel it's got a destination.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own D. Gray-Man**

"Hold him down!" Eric yelled.

Kanda was lying on the bed, his limbs spasming jerkily. His breathing was much, much slower, and more labored. His hands were flying in the air, finding something to get a hold on. Everyone was thinking the same thing, _Poor guy..._

Rebecca stepped forward and pinned Kanda's arms down, everyone sent her a thankful look. Lavi was struggling to keep his chest down.

"Wow! He's strong." Rebecca commented while struggling to keep the arms still. Lavi shook his head. It should've been easy for Kanda, a second exorcist, to break out of the team's strong grips. Lavi was getting more and more worried. While, Lenalee sat in obliviousness.

Kanda flinched away from something in pain, then stilled.

Eric squeezed the sedative into Kanda's shoulder, Kanda fell asleep with an accusingly heartbreaking stare. Lavi looked away quickly. He sprang up from the bed, scanning the room. Finally, Lavi found what he had feared, the packet that Kanda was allergic to was by the bedside table.

"Eric," Lavi was dangerously calm, "Why would you let him have this! It's deadly to him!"

Eric looked him in the eye, "What did you expect me to do, remove all of it from the room, or place it on a high shelf like he was a child!"

"Well, yes, that would be a good start!" Lavi snapped back. He punched Eric in the face to get the point across, then he and Lenalee searched Kanda's pockets for the said tablets.

Why, Kanda, why do you keep trying to do this?

Finally, after what seemed like hours, but really was just minutes, Kanda's spasms stopped. Eric sedated him again, knowing the sedative already administered wouldn't last very long.

"We need to talk, Lavi," Eric pulled him aside.

Lavi rested against a wall, he still blamed Eric for the allergy incident. But he knew that it wasn't his fault. It was... Lavi couldn't bring himself to blame Kanda.

"It's not the first time he's tried this, is it?"

Lavi remained silent, which was an answer in itself. Then, he turned towards him, "If you had gotten rid of them, this wouldn't of ever happened!"

"That's not the problem here, Lavi, and you should know that by now," Eric stated in a calmer manor than seemed possible at the time. "We need to find out what's wrong with Kanda, he can't heal if we don't. Mental illness are the hardest to cure."

"He's not mentally injured!" Lavi was reaching his boiling point.

Eric just stared at him, his eyes looked as if they were apologizing.

"I'll figure this out," Lavi walked back into Kanda's room. Kanda's arm was hanging off the side of the bed, Lavi stopped instantly, almost as fast as a second exorcist can move, Lavi was rolling up his sleeves, looking at his skin. The skin itself was filled with pale scratches. Barely healed scars.

"Kanda," Lavi focused on breathing. He found out how he missed it the first time, the scars and the pale color of the skin was almost identical, unless if you looked at it in the right light and angle. But the bigger question was, did someone do this to Kanda, or had he done it to himself? With Kanda you just don't know right now. Lavi shuddered, he didn't know which one would be worse.

Carefully, Lavi rolled back down Kanda's sleeves. Then gathered the sleeping figure in his arms. Even though Kanda would never admit it, he needed hugs sometimes. And even sleeping people should be able to feel it if they were being hugged.

A few hours later, Lavi stared at the clock nervously. Kanda's sedative should be wearing out around now.

Kanda's eyes flickered slowly open. Then his eyes flashed faster than humanly possible to take in his surroundings. Just looking at it sent Lavi's headache into motion, that must hurt! Kanda sank further into Lavi's exorcist coat.

私が今まであなたに何何をしたか、ちょうど私は自分自身を殺すしましょう ！Kanda was yelling at him.

Lavi drew back in shock, he knew a lot of people couldn't speak English at the Order, but had the obvious torture Kanda had gone through make him forget that? Over all the time at the Order, he had to have picked up some, Lavi decided. But something was wrong with Kanda, and Lavi wouldn't rest until he found out what it was.

Rebecca was watching Lavi and Kanda from behind the door, as Lavi cradled Kanda, rubbing his back. A shot of jealously reverberated through her, but her common sense overpowered the emotion. How could she feel anything but pity to the small, whimpering thing in Lavi's arms? He was no threat to anyone at this moment.

"Lavi?" Rebecca stepped out from the shadows.

Lavi looked incredibly relieved, "Kanda's finally fallen asleep. But I would like to stay until he wakes up, would you like to join me?"

Rebecca paused, it wasn't an order, she noticed. Lavi gave her a choice. "Is there anything I can do for Kanda?"

Lavi's eyes widened, making Rebecca feel guilty. Was it really unlikely that she would want to help Kanda? Yes, she decided, yes, it was. She hadn't been friendly to the second exorcist since he arrived here.

Lavi looked with gratitude as he turned to Rebecca, he really, _really_ liked talking about Kanda, whether it was good or bad, "Um," Lavi started, "Soba noodles, he always eats those, ew. Oh! He always used to replace my innocence with a banana, so maybe one of those."

Rebecca breathed, "Would you like to have me watch him so you can maybe shop, or check on the Akuma?" the undertone was, Lavi, it's not healthy to stay under here, so listen to me. "I'll keep him away from the pills that he's allergic to, I'll phone you if something bad occurs."

"Okay," Lavi half-reluctantly untangled his arms from Kanda, "Hugs, hugs tend to calm him down." Then he left the room.

Standing awkwardly in the middle of the room was Rebecca, then she surged forward to the chair placed by the bed. A tightly drawn together ball of black exorcist uniform was scrunched in the covers, twitching once and a while. Even though Kanda was sleeping, Rebecca couldn't shake the feeling that something or someone was watching her.

Rebecca took the time to study this...Kanda. He had dark circles under his eyes, and his face was contorted with pain. Heck, he looked like he'd been through some tough times. The second exorcist rolled over and whimpered, and Rebecca's heart melted as everyone else's did.

Rebecca brushed some of the long hair out of Kanda's face, and moved his arm into a more comfortable position. Then, she gasped, she noticed the scars that Lavi had noticed previously. But, she also so a marking on Kanda's wrist. Looking into it further, she noticed a red, burned brand. It had the initials M.E. on it, Rebecca wondered what happen to Kanda. She was positive that the boy had been tortured, but by who? And why? What made him want to commit suicide? She was intrigued by the exorcist in front of her. She could see why even though the obvious attitude that he had, how Lenalee and Lavi had been pulled in. Kanda had an aura, it entranced people, awake or asleep.

"Tiedoll," escaped from Kanda's lips, "Noise Marie, no succeed, 6th institute." it went on and on.

She memorized these words to tell Lavi later, maybe he could make sense of it. But she kept the brand to herself, it was better if he found out on his own.

Sitting back down, Rebecca watched the lonely and utterly broken boy in front of her.

**A.N. That's a wrap! Just wondering, should I make a chapter where Tiedoll comes flanking into Treefire? Let me know, so review!**


	4. Chapter 4

**A.N. Hi again, to those of you who are reading! I would just like to add that the lack of reviews doesn't bother me, I'm still going to continue the story, but I'm thinking of re-writing the first chapter to get rid of the bronze jar, it really bugs me.**

**Disclaimer: I own none.**

"We're getting something!" Hikaru yelled to the rest of the Treefire members. The whole team gathered around the screen, leaving out the slumbering Kanda in the room next door.

"Wait," Hikaru chanted as she clicked something on the screen. "A transmission."

"We want Yuu Kanda," an all-too-familiar voice called out. Lenalee and Lavi knew that they should know who it was, but for some reason, couldn't place the voice. As fast as lightning, Lavi sprang up and ran out of the room, he came back with his frantic face toned down completely.

"He's fine," Lavi said, "Just sleeping."

Lenalee's face hardened, "They probably thought he was vulnerable, but they obviously forgot us."

"Trace the signal," Lavi continued, "We need to know what we're dealing with."

"Already ahead of you," Hikaru called back to him.

"Tell me when you find something," Lavi answered. He faced Rebecca, Lenalee, and Eric, "I want Treefire on total lockdown, nothing will go in, and nothing will go out. Or, at least until we find out why those things want Kanda and they've been taken care of."

"Isn't that over-doing this a little bit," Lenalee stepped forward, Rebecca had the same expression as her.

"NO!" Lavi yelled, though the small sane part left of him told him that anger was unreasonable, "Things want to kill him as much as all the other exorcists, and we keep doing what we do..." Lavi stormed out of the room.

"All we want is for you, Lavi, to explain things," Lenalee called after him, "But, yes, we will do it."

"Oh, Kanda, why do people always choose this time to kidnap and torture you? All you need now is rest and care and not some akuma to go off and fight!" Lavi was drawing pictures on Kanda's hand, "Don't worry, Yuu, I'll deal with whatever is coming, okay?" Kanda's eyebrows came together slightly, but other than that, Lavi had no clue on whether Yuu had heard him.

"Go to bed, Lavi," Eric was standing in the doorway of Kanda's room. Lavi tried to protest, but stood up anyway. He's only taken two breaks from watching Kanda. And he was exhausted. He cringed in horror at the feeling that someone might try to kidnap his friend and him being too tired to defend him. The second exorcist was asleep now, anyway.

Lavi blinked sleep out of his eyes and felt irrational panic. But then he calmed down remembering that his friend was next door. He didn't even bother putting on his exorcist uniform. He just wore sweatpants and a white t shirt. Barely pausing in the mirror, he ran next door to Yuu. What awaited for him was definitely not the expected.

Kanda was once again huddled in a corner, like he had been when he first came to Treefire. And Eric was standing in the middle of the room looking as innocent as ever. He was holding a black tape recorder.

"Eric?" Lavi was determined not to jump to conclusions on what obviously had happened.

The medic looked at Lavi unashamedly, "I played the tape to Kanda, and it had a massive effect on him."

Lavi didn't know what to feel, he felt happy for the new info, but not for the way they found it out. He was a mixture. But then he felt nothing but anger, he ran forward to Kanda, and grabbed him by his shoulders, he shook him a little.

"Did the people on the recording do this to you?" Lavi demanded. But it was no use. It was like speaking to a brick wall, a trembling brick wall, mind you, but a brick wall. Kanda helplessly writhed in pain in Lavi's arms before his eyes rolled to the back of his head and he became still.

"Sit, Kanda I'm so sorry, I really didn't mean to," Lavi said as what he had done came to him.

**A.N. A cliffhanger, haven't really had one of these, have I, well then, review! Please! *on knees crying***


	5. Chapter 5

**A.N. I'm back, hopefully you people like this chapter.**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing. Except for my property, but that's all in my room.**

"You shouldn't have done that,"

Lavi sprang to his feet in surprise. Lenalee was standing in the doorframe, her face was a picture of disapproval.

"I KNOW, LENALEE!" Lavi surprised himself with the force in his voice, "I know," a tear found its way down his face, "I need to go."

Lavi bowed his head at the other wall, and he slid down his wall as well. "I always mess up everything." he mumbled, "If I stopped myself from doing that Kanda-"

"It happens to the best of people, Lavi," Rebecca said, a lot of people seemed to love sneaking up on Lavi today.

"Well, it shouldn't, it's not supposed to, none of you grabbed him so and shook him so hard that he passed out." Lavi was a picture of shame.

Rebecca slid down the other wall of the hallway to look at him, "Think of the real Kanda, and I know Kanda's still real but his old personality. He was cold and stoic, right? Dinner is in an hour."

Lavi was left to think about what she meant. The real Kanda looked out at the world as a devoid of emotions. He never told anyone if he was happy, sad, joyous, hibernating. Wait, what?

He remembered back to when he first called Kanda, 'Yuu'. Kanda had been angry at him, he freaking tried to decapitate him. But it had gotten better and Kanda could stand being in Lavi's presence. In Lavi's mind, Kanda was glaring him speechless.

"Yuu," Lavi looked up, "We're going to get you back to normal, no. Better than normal. Because when I see this ruined look in your eyes, I wonder how bad your normal really is."

**A.N. I know, bad excuse for a chapter. Just imagine it as like that first few pages when reading a series when it feels the need to recap all you know? Like, it's not like we worship the material or anything. *looks around nervously***

**Review!**


	6. Chapter 6

**A.N. Sorry for the short chapter last time, I really, really wanted just to get something down before I went to my grandparents.**

**Sorry, this is a short chapter.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own D. Gray-Man, but I do own the OCs.**

Lavi became aware of himself as the smell as Rebecca's coffee came to meet his nose. He sat up at his chair by his desk. Wait, why was he at his desk? The events of last night-day came to him and he covered his mouth with his hand. He gulped down the still-hot coffee, self awareness flew through him. He had to somehow make up his actions yesterday to Kanda!

A look in the second exorcist's room filled Lavi with a bad image. Kanda wasn't there. The bed was messy, like someone didn't care. And some of the bandages were missing. Lavi feared that Kanda had tried to commit suicide, again. He ran past someone sitting in Hikaru's chair...

Lavi skidded to a stop and looked back, confused. Kanda, who a few days ago had trouble walking, was sitting in the chair, fingers flying across the keyboard with second exorcist speeds. Lavi tried to say something, but couldn't. Kanda seemed to have realized his presence and spoke up in Lavi's place.

"It seemed that a flock, or something, of akuma possibly was seen circling around here, probably looking for someo- Never mind, they're gone at the second." Kanda's voice had hardened when they had disappeared off the radar.

Kanda turned and offered Lavi a forced smile. Reason he knew it was forced, this is Kanda we're talking about here. "We'll I'm off, then."

Lavi was confused at Kanda's change in personality, what was Kanda doing here? "You shouldn-" Lavi started. Regaining his old demeanor, he said with much more force, "No."

Kanda's attitude changed almost instantly. Kanda's spine seemed to turn to stone and his hands were clenched. "What did you say?" Kanda's voice was icier than normal.

"No," Lavi was much more confident, "Rebecca! Lenalee! Come in here!" He needed some backup, since the glare that Kanda gave akuma was currently pointed at him. He hoped he didn't visibly relax in relief when the two people came up from behind him. Eric seemed to have joined them as well. Shaking his head and mumbling something about the exorcist on his feet. No doubt his medical side of his brain was kicking him.

Kanda shook with anger.

"You're not leaving," Lavi stepped forward and grabbed one of Kanda's arms, Eric, on instinct grabbed the other.

"You can't leave," Lenalee sounded desperate, "Look at you, Kanda!" she gestured to his still pale skin and wrapped injuries.

With little effort, thanks to being a second exorcist, Kanda shook Lavi and Eric off, sending them flying across the room. Lenalee and Rebecca gasped.

Kanda's eyes were murderous, "I'M NOT SOME TYPE OF BIRD TO BE CAGED, LENALEE!" he yelled at her, "I HAVE SPENT FAR TOO MUCH TIME HOLDING BACK MY TRUE NATURE IN ATTEMPT TO HELP THE ORDER AND DID YOU SEE HOW BAD I USUALLY ACT! ALL YOU EXORCISTS DO ANYWAY IS BREAK MY HEART!"

The room was silent as those words imbedded themselves in the ears of people in the room. Hikaru rushed in, "What happened?" she looked around, saw Kanda, and only answered herself with a measly, "Oh,"

Lavi pulled himself off the ground, that he noted probably needed to be washed, started walking towards Kanda. Kanda turned to look at him and all of the anger faded from him. His shoulders sagged and the icy tones in his eyes began to fade.

"I-I-I-I..." Kanda stuttered, Lavi was there to catch him when Kanda fell to the ground, fainted.

**A.N. Review! The doctors tell you to do it because you might experience a happy author, faster updates, and just plain Kanda angst!**

**If you experience those symptoms, do it again, and again, and again.**

**Review!**


	7. Chapter 7

**A.N. Hello!**

**Disclaimer: I own none.**

"He's gone mad. Crazy, raving, bonkers, off-his-rocker," Eric commented disdainfully.

Lavi glared at him, but he didn't say anything. He didn't have the energy.

Lenalee stepped forward, "Lavi," she said accusingly, "He's not human, is he?"

Lavi shifted, his position didn't seem as comfortable anymore, "I forgot to tell you," he was lying strait through his teeth.

"So you just forgot to tell us that your best friend, and mine, isn't a normal exorcist."

"We already knew," Eric said, and Lavi gave him another deadly glare.

"You all knew about this!" Lenalee shouted, man, she was livid.

"If it's of any use, I didn't," Hikaru offered. Lavi almost jumped at the sound of her voice.

"I don't mind the fact that he's different, just that you'll tell everyone but me." Lenalee shook her head.

Lavi felt a sudden burst of anger, thinking of the exorcist slumped in his arms. "You're so selfish Lenalee!" he yelled. Everyone looked genuinely surprised. "Maybe my first priority is to get him back to good health, and not telling everyone about his personal life!"

Lenalee was silent. Eric was whistling innocently.

Lavi looked back down at Kanda, "Look, I can't, I need to, just leave me alone with Kanda for a while. He's more important than any stupid silly fights we're having."

Rebecca stood up at the speed of light, "It's always going to be like this, isn't it? Some outsider you call exorcist will always be more important than anyone else."

Lavi couldn't say anything. Rebecca took that as an answer.

"I guess I'll be going then, it's nice to finally know the truth." she snarled at him.

Rebecca walked out, slamming against any chairs that were in her way.

Lavi looked around, "Anyone else going to follow pursuit? Because if you are then just get out right now!"

Eric snorted, "We're not leaving you alone with that nutcase, that guy needs to be restrained."

Lenalee shuddered, but she knew it was the only thing they could do right now.

A few seconds later, Eric lay on the floor, knocked out by Lavi, blood trickling from his nose.

"That's what I think of anyone who insults Kanda, clear?" Lavi asked, shaking in pure rage. He had been so sure everything was going well but since one moment of madness when he had flipped out on Kanda his whole life started to slowly crumble down.

"Right," he said, lifting Kanda on his left shoulder, (a part of him worrying that he only weighed sixty pounds) and he strode out.

"Lavi?"

Lavi looked up straight away. Kanda's eyes were slowly opening.

Lavi was with him in an instant.

"I'm sorry, L-Lavi." he stuttered.

"Don't worry, it's going to be okay," Lavi said, not sure who he was trying to comfort. It was the wrong thing to say.

"They always said that!" Kanda accused, his eyes were deadly. Lavi shrank back. "Always! It's a lie! I thought I could trust you! It was a mistake! I can never trust any of you exorcists! Never!" Kanda was screaming the last words again, and Lavi recognized this start of what he had done before. He was powerless to stop it.

Kanda began to swear a long string of Japanese words that Kanda thought was impossible to come from a human's mouth. There was one recurring phrase always. "Watashi wa, anata ga daikiraidesu."

Lavi may not know a lot of Japanese, but he remembered enough from Bookman. It meant, I hate you. His heart was shattered even more than it already had been. That's not Kanda speaking, he told himself. Or he hoped. It's just whatever happened to him. Don't listen.

A hand came up and hit his nose, hard. Lavi leapt back to avoid Kanda's arms.

"You might want these." Eric said from behind him.

Lavi turned around, remembering that he was still annoyed with Eric for all his comment earlier. Eric was holding four pairs of metal clamps. Lavi didn't want to tie Kanda down like that, since it would create a impression on him that no one wanted. But the way he was left them with no other choice. Because, whatever he did to deny it, Kanda would always be deadly enough to strike down anyone who crossed his path. And if they let him go in the state he was in now. Lavi shuddered.

"Okay. Give them here," he said.

**A.N. Review please. Reviews are as necessary as water or food or air, etc.**

**I'm begging you all.**


	8. Chapter 8

**A.N. I got a review about my ramblings about Kanda's 'spaceship'. I don't know why I call it a spaceship, actually. I think it's more of an exorcist traveling ship. Like before the whole Ark thing. That just happens to be in Kanda's closet, yeah.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own D. Gray-Man, but I own Treefire and OCs.**

Kanda was now fastened to his bed with metal clamps at the arms and legs. Lavi hated seeing him like this. Constantly sedating him wasn't going to help Kanda get better, he was thinking. He vowed to figure out what was ailing Kanda, and to fix it. That hadn't worked out so far. He moved closer to Kanda, wondering what could have happened to the Second Exorcist to make him like this. It was so confusing. No, mind-blowing.

Lavi's eyes skimmed Kanda's face. A feminine look to it, deadly paleness, and hair that looked like he had a little too much fun with blue food coloring. There was absolutely nothing that gave any clues to what might've happened to him. Lavi sighed. He put all the things that he discovered into a list.

~Kanda had arrived, injured.

~He had the alcoholic packet things with him in the bronze jar.

~The flinching, then the spasms.

The list kept going, finally ending when the Treefire team had to restrain Kanda because of his flailing arms. At least, Lavi hoped that they were flailing, not purposely punching him. But with Kanda you can never be sure.

All evidence led to the conclusion that something bad happened to Kanda. Well, done, Lavi, how clever of you, he congratulated himself sarcastically. Anyone would be able to see that just by looking at him. What he needed now were more clues pointing who did it.

_Creak._

Lavi looked up. The noise appeared to have came from no where. He looked down again, thinking it was just his imagination.

He had to wake Kanda up, Lavi decided. Thinking about everything that Kanda had done in the past, he never harmed anyone past the time when it was supposedly over, he just couldn't see why Kanda would harm him now. The stray fist must have been one of the peculiar reflexes that the Second Exorcist Program gave him. Lavi's face hardened. He was quite sure Kanda had been tortured, like being a Second Exorcist wasn't enough. That would explain the flinches and the pale, almost malnourished, no definitely malnourished skin. Lavi would put a stop to that and make sure Kanda ate properly, and not just soba noodles, for once. Even when Kanda was 10, fighting Alma Karma, it seemed that he had held back. Lavi gulped, or maybe it was just Kanda making a way so no one else noticed. That realization made Lavi even angrier with himself. How could anyone hurt anyone in that way, who could be that sadistic? Lavi changed the topic knowing getting angry would help nothing.

_Creak._

Lavi definitely heard it this time. But taking a quick glance around the room, didn't see anything that was out of place.

Lavi shrugged. He looked back at Kanda for about the millionth time that day. It was hypnotizing to watch Kanda sleep, you just didn't know what he was dreaming about. He could be dreaming about nothing, or an awesome adventure he had, had with his friends.

Kanda flinched in his sleep, movements restricted. A whimper escaped from his mouth. Lavi sighed. Or Kanda could be dreaming about whatever he had gone through before turning up at Treefire.

_Creak._

Lavi was sure that he had heard something this time. His eyes scanned the room, looking for the source of the noise. Oh. Lavi let out a breath, only to have to take one in again. The clamps obviously were having no effect. Even in his sleep, Kanda's Second Exorcist strength was slowly bending the metal. Lavi wondered how much of Kanda's true self he showed. Was the anger he showed the Order his real self, or was he trying to hold back for there sakes? Or was he just plain afraid and blocked himself out with anger? Lavi thought he knew Kanda, but as time went on he was feeling more unsure than an untrained bull fighter fighting the bull. Kanda was always so guarded, shying away or yelling at people who came too close to him. The sickeningly superhuman strength the exorcist was showing was just another one of his many secrets.

Kanda's eyelids flickered. Lavi's heart beat much faster in his chest and for a moment he wondered if Kanda, or anyone else, could hear it.

"Kanda?" Lavi asked, not sure of what reaction he might get.

Kanda's eyes opened fully and he looked around with a panicked expression for a second before his face fell back into one of his usual masks.

"I'm sorry," he said, and continued before Lavi could get anything in, "I let myself get...out of control. It won't happen again, I promise,"

"Kanda..." Lavi didn't quite know what to say. He really wanted to know what had happened to Kanda but judging the last event this was definitely not something which would be a good idea right now. "I forgive you," he said honestly. Lavi was trying to work on stopping making false promises. And he hoped Kanda was learning to trust people, such as himself.

Kanda looked at Lavi gratefully and easily ripped away the clamps that held him to the bed. Lavi watched for the reaction to the way he had been bound, but apart from a look of disappointment Kanda's face remained expressionless. A poker face, Lavi thought.

"Lavi?"

"Yes?"

"How bad was I?" Kanda looked Lavi straight in the eyes.

"What do you mean-"

"Spare me the truth. How badly did I flip out?" Kanda said, his tone was a little harsh.

Lavi looked at him and then opened his mouth to answer but Kanda cut him off.

"I'm sorry. I just...6 years and then suddenly all of that..." Kanda had the faraway look again.

"All of what?" Lavi asked, "What happened?" But immediately after he felt bad. It was getting on the 6 year anniversary of Alma Karma's murdering rampage, and the day Kanda killed him.

Kanda looked up and stopped glaring, but that was fake. You could see it in his eyes. He wasn't ready to do that to Alma obviously. Now thinking back, there were only a few time Kanda had really been with him and Lenalee. Mostly is was just part of his frail façade.

"Nothing happened. Don't be silly, I'm fine. Always," Kanda was lying right through his teeth.

Lavi wanted to protest that he had scars all over his arms and had tried to kill himself but he knew it wouldn't do any use. Once again, he was sure that he was not going to let Kanda go anywhere. He just had to go about it more subtly. That way he could find out more about Kanda's recent past as well.

"Kanda?" Lavi asked.

The exorcist had been staring the floor dazedly. His head snapped up really fast, and for a second Lavi was scared he was about to start shouting like he had only a few hours before. But his expression was just simply surprised, "Yeah?"

"Do you want to come..." Lavi was struggling to think of something that would make him sure Kanda wouldn't try running off again, "help me sort out some of the junk that comes through the Akuma?"

"Okay," Kanda replied. He then bit his bottom lip, looking as if he was about to say something else but had instantly forgotten.

"Come on then," Lavi was smiling encouragingly, though on the inside e was close to hollering in joy. He only had one more chance with Kanda-he had already messed up once and that wasn't going to happen again. Things could only take so much bending before they shattered, so he was going to be as patient as he had to be if he wanted Kanda to get back to normal. Normal people don't try to kill themselves, and that was seemingly his top priority. Game plan A was in motion.

**A.N. I would love to know what more of you readers think of the story! I'm like kneeling on the ground, asking you for help.**

**Innocence is Powerful**

**Noah are Lazy**

**Akuma are Mean**

**So please Review!**


	9. Chapter 9

**A.N. I'm back! **

**Disclaimer: I don't own D. Gray-Man. But I do own my OCs.**

"There's loads of stuff in here," Lavi said, gesturing to some boxes filled with stuff that came out of the Akuma, "We always mean to try to sort it out, but stuff comes up."

Kanda remained silent. His shoulders were hunched and he looked in the crowded room with something sort of like, fear. "I'll wait here," his voice got out, his voice looked sounded like he was about to cry, you know, the hitch you get in your throat? And yes, it was very fearful.

Lavi was very confused by this, but let Kanda stay outside. Looking around he saw that there were no windows or any different exit routes. Was Kanda claustrophobic? Or had he just simply been locked in a place similar to this one? Lavi added this to his mental file and lifted to heavy boxes full of stuff in the air. He walked out, closed the door, beckoning Kanda to follow him to his desk. He set the two boxes on the table, and this made a low, muffled noise. Lavi also added Kanda's flinch to the noise in his file.

"What if I do one, and you do the other one? I'll ask you if I don't know what something is if I'm not sure about it, okay?" Lavi attempted to pull Kanda into a conversation, but all he did in return was give a nod of head.

Lavi sighed mentally and opened the first box, almost sneezing at the dust that had gathered inside. Kanda was still standing awkwardly beside him. Lavi pulled out a chair and pushed the other box closer to him. Taking the hit, the exorcist sat down and stared at the box placed in front of him.

"Could this be useful?" Lavi asked, carefully holding a bottle of liquid. Hey, you don't know what the liquid is, so safety first, right?

Kanda glanced at it before shaking his head, "Looks to be an old canteen, shouldn't work here. There's a different pressure in the air." he said, in an alarmingly subdued tone of voice. Lavi himself was worried. Normally Kanda would have started on about he was a Baka and was squeezing it so if the pressure was right he'd have been drenched, confusing the living daylights out of everyone. He reminded himself to be patient and said absolutely nothing, throwing the item into the rubbish pile.

Half an hour later Lavi was starting to get hungry. He took a peek at Kanda, who was sitting completely and utterly still, staring at what appeared to be a letter stamp. His eyes were glazed over and Lavi could see his fest were clenched, and his knuckles were turning a disturbing shade of white. Lavi's hear started to beat faster, "Kanda?" he said cautiously, fighting to keep control of the tone of his voice, he tried to keep it calm, but inside he was completely anxious.

The Second Exorcist's head snapped around to look at him, startled. He seemed to look at the object in his hand and paled, if that was even possible anymore. "Throw it away," his voice was devoid of emotion, chucking it at Lavi and getting a new object the Akuma had spit out.

Lavi took the metal and stared at it curiously, noting that the two letters spelled 'me' on the underside. What was the point of have a letter stamper if it only stamped that? Remembering Kanda's reaction to it, he put the object to the side of his desk, deciding to keep it. He made sure Kanda didn't see him do that. He didn't want to make the exorcist feel like he was betraying his trust.

"Kanda?" Lavi asked. The exorcist turned around slightly. Lavi took this as a sign that he had been heard. "You know we all love you, right? Everyone at the Black Order loves you no matter how badly you #!*% them off. That makes it that the Order is the biggest family anyone can have. And everyone cares for you. They all want you to get better." he had to say that in case they had to hold back Tiedoll.

Kanda turned around, expressionless. A spark of anger was in his eyes. "Then why weren't you there?" he snapped, but it was quiet. He looked back at the box in front of him, acting as if it never had happened.

Lavi didn't have a reply to that. Just then he felt another pang. Oh, yeah, he was hungry. "Do you want something to eat?" he asked Kanda, noting the skeletal frame he had. He knew no matter what was his answer, he would make sure he ate something, anything!

"I'm not hungry," Kanda mumbled. Lavi wasn't the slightest surprised.

"I'll bring soba anyway, okay?" Lavi stood up and left the room, and ran as fast as possible to the kitchen. He wanted to get back as soon as possible-he didn't want to have Kanda out of his line of sight for too long, especially not knowing if he would still try to commit suicide. Or go on a mad attach.

He grabbed a plate, just put some soba on there, and ran out. Not expecting to run into somebody. The breath was knocked out of him and he almost dropped the plate.

"Lavi," Lenalee yelled, but her eyes looked very uneasy.

Lavi didn't say anything, still a bit angry at her from before even though he knew that it was unfair to be mad at her. He made to go past Lenalee, but she stopped him with a light hand on his shoulder. "Is he okay now?"

Lavi stopped, and swallowed, "I hope he will be. I really do hope so," his voice was filled with sincerity. And it was also very soft and quiet.

"I don't mind, you know that, right?" Lenalee brought up conversationally.

Lavi looked at her, very, very confused.

"That he's not a regular exorcist, I don't mind." she told him.

"Thanks," Lavi replied.

"Can I go see him?" Lenalee asked.

"Maybe a bit later," Lavi said, he was still thinking about a scared Kanda was and/or was acting, "I don't want to overwhelm him. And I wouldn't suggest asking about his scars, or why he...is the way he is. I don't, I just want to stop him feeling like he's being pressured or something. He'll be able to tell us when he's ready,"

Lenalee nodded, "Rebecca called," she pointed out.

Lavi's head was like a balloon, went straight up, "Really?"

"Yeah, she wanted to know how you were doing."

"So, she's not coming back?"

"Well...not yet. She said she needed sometime to think things through,"

A pang of absolute despair rippled through Lavi, "She has no reason to be so jealous."

"I know," Lenalee interrupted him, "I understand now. Kanda said something about 9 years, does that mean he'll have a limited life span? I can tell you just want to hang around him while he's still there."

"But that's the thing!" Lavi didn't realize he raised his voice, "He has a regeneration seal! So immediately he thinks that he can throw himself around like he doesn't matter anymore! He doesn't give that he'll be dying sooner if he does it a thought in his mind, he'll just end up being alone. I believe he's mean to everyone because when he does go, he doesn't want anyone to be hurt."

"Lavi..."

"I need to go. I'll tell you when he'll be up for visitors, okay?" Lavi didn't wait for her response, he sprinted down the hall.

Kanda was nearly done his box of Akuma objects, and was sitting still in the chair. He didn't react at all to Lavi.

"I've got soba noodles!" Lavi tried to tempt him.

Kanda just shook his head.

"I'll put them right here," Lavi set the plate down between them, scooting it closer to Kanda in attempt to get him to eat it.

They worked away in absolute silence for a couple more minutes, and Lavi was pleased to see a couple noodles were missing, and yes, he did count. He probably would rather eat on his own, Lavi pulled together. There was a rustling of paper next to him. Lavi looked around, and saw that Kanda was pressing the button on a square piece of green, soft- goop. Every time that Kanda pressed the button, the papers on Jack's desk would rustle.

"Kanda? Please don't do that, I just sorted those files this morning," Lavi tried to be as friendly as possible.

Kanda then curled in on himself, rocking backwards and forwards, "I'm sorry, I'm sorry Lavi, I really didn't mean to, I'm so sorry, I'm sorry," his voice sounded dangerously close to crying at the end.

"It's okay!" Lavi said quickly, no sure if he should comfort Kanda or if it would cause an unwanted reaction, "I really don't mind!"

Slowly, Kanda stopped shaking and looked at him with nothing but surprise, his navy eyes full of sorrow, and a few tears by the looks of it, "Really?" he whispered.

"Yes," Lavi's voice was firm, "I honestly don't care what you do, I'm not going to hurt you, you know that, don't you?"

Kanda didn't reply, but he looked thoughtful. and when Lavi gave him a pat on the back, he stiffened, but didn't flinch away. This tiny progress made Lavi's eyes water. Although there was something missing, he couldn't shake off that feeling, he felt sure that Kanda would be okay again. He would be there every step of the way.

**A.N. I'm back, I was thinking early that this might be a good ending, NOT! I still have to explain so much! I'm not ending just yet!**

**LOVE is DIVINE,**

**PROBLEMS are FIXED,**

**NOT REVIEWING is a MISTAKE.**


	10. Chapter 10

**A.N. I'm back! I've worked up a sweat thinking of new ideas for this chapter, tell me if it is good!**

**Disclaimer: I own none.**

"Lavi, we can't have total lockdown on the Treefire for much longer, you drink coffee often and we're beginning to run out of milk. You said the only reason you shut down Treefire was to protect Kanda from that one message we got. Most likely, if it was them-can't you see why this isn't reasonable anymore?" Lenalee complained. She was trying to get some juice, but there wasn't anymore left.

"It isn't healthy to stay inside for this long," Hikaru added helpfully.

Lavi scanned the room, he was very nervous, "You're probably right. We haven't heard anything since..." he trailed off, but he was very unsure. He recalled crocodiles, they 'tagged' there prey and follow it looking for the opportunity to strike it. Lavi shook the feeling off, "Okay," he finally said, "Unlock us,"

While Hikaru started typing, Lavi began to think about how he could get Kanda to talk. Obviously, the event - or maybe there were several events, plural this time - was so bad that a direct question caused Kanda to have bad reactions and panic attacks. No, let's not do that. There had to be a way to be more subtle way of doing it. Lavi thought back to his childhood, being with Bookman. He couldn't remember much, but he did remember that Bookman gave him a lump of clay when he was feeling mad. "Take your anger out on it," he would say.

Perfect, Lavi thought. He suddenly felt glad he had let Hikaru take Treefire out of lockdown. As soon as he could, he would get some more supplies, he was going to find out what happened. No, everything that happened.

Kanda was sitting in the middle of the room quietly, fiddling with a piece of scrap. He looked up when Lavi came in.

"Hello there," Lavi grinned his most friendly and not threatening smile he had, "Feel up to walk to the shops?" he asked really hopefully. He didn't want to put so much pressure down on Kanda.

Kanda looked at Lavi in surprise for a second, as if he couldn't believe Lavi would want to go somewhere with him, but after a moment he spoke, "Okay," he said. Lavi had to strain his ears to hear Kanda's voice.

"Great!" Lavi was wincing as he sounded a bit TOO happy. "Come along, then."

Kanda stood up immediately, and they made their way to the shop. When they were both almost out of Treefire, Lavi realized that Kanda was about to go outside in a thin T-shirt and a pair of shorts that he had borrowed. "Kanda! You can't go outside like that! It's freezing!" Lavi exclaimed, feeling a little guilty when Kanda started.

"I feel fine like this," he mumbled.

"At least wear a jacket," Lavi protested.

Kanda was stock-still. When he did look at Lavi his eyes felt like the calm before the storm, "I said I was fine like this," he told him, his voice disturbingly close to growling.

Lavi backed off Kanda right away, although he was uncomfortable with Kanda wearing thin clothing when it was basically in the negatives outside. "That's fine! I just was thinking that you'd be cold..."

"I won't be," Kanda had a tone of finality in his voice.

Lavi remained silent, he had a right to, right? He was afraid to push Kanda even more on the subject. His hand was laid out, hinting that he needed to grab Kanda's hand to show the way. But Kanda snatched his away.

When they arrived at the market, Lavi grabbed a trolley from outside and went straight to the section were the things they needed were. Kanda trailed slowly behind him, curling in on himself a little. The Bookman judged that Kanda was definitely not used to being around so many different people yet. Lavi gave him space to adjust. At least he was willing to go out in public, that was progress.

When they had gotten pretty much everything they needed, he checked Kanda and he was still behind him. Lavi had a block of clay and some bananas. Hoping it would get Kanda to at least prank him or something, and milk.

"Is there anything else?" Lavi asked Kanda, but he didn't respond. Lavi whipped himself around at top speed, relaxing when he saw Kanda just stopped in front of a shelf. But the worry in his chest built up again when he saw what was on the shelf...knives. "Kanda?" he attempted.

Kanda didn't turn over still. People were starting to look at them curiously. Lavi hurried forward and put a hand on Kanda's shoulder. Kanda finally turned towards him, his eyes were glazed over.

"Are you okay, Yuu?" Lavi's heart was beating fast in his chest. He was hoping with all of the hope he could give out that all the progress they had made with him wasn't about to give out now.

Kanda shook his head, eyes turning to normal blue color. He looked around, as if questioning where he was. When his eyes settled on Lavi, Lavi was relieved to see recognition flow through them. "Yeah, I'm fine?" his statement wasn't much of one.

"Good," Lavi knew all was not well, "Shall we go?"

Kanda nodded timidly. As they walked outside, Lavi caught a shudder go through the exorcist's body. He removed his coat, and handed it to Kanda. To Lavi's surprise, he excepted it wordlessly.

Back at their headquarters, Lavi took out the clay. he weighed it in his hands for a second, not at all sure of what to tell Kanda with. The Second Exorcist was currently sleeping again. He thought maybe a note would be good. So he wouldn't have to face wrath. If there was any.

Lavi got out a pen, and tried so very hard to right neatly.

Dear Kanda,

Here's some clay...

Lavi scrunched up that one, it was no good. And he threw it in a bin.

To Kanda,

I think you'd like...

No, that wasn't it either. He decided to try to keep it simple.

In case you get bored.

From, Lavi XXX

Were the kisses too much? Lavi paused. No, they weren't. One, it was a bit of his awesome personality. And he wanted to Kanda to know that everyone, no matter how stoic he can be, loves him. After all, that was Lavi's method of Kanda's recovering. Tender (Yuu), loving care.

He placed the clay in Kanda's room. It looked awkward sitting there, but it'll do. He left the room, knowing well that Kanda hated it when people were watching his every move. If he did move, that is. Lavi hoped it would work, because every time he thought of an idea, he'd screw up.

Cup of coffee at hand, Lavi sat down to wait. He decided to give Kanda a good few hours before he went to check upon him again. But he was attentive to any noises that might come from the exorcist's room. Plan A was going well. This was going to work.

**A.N. Sorry for not updating. What do you expect from me? I don't proclaim to be royalty...wait, I'm sorry.**

**Review, it'll only take a second.**


	11. Chapter 11

**A.N. Sorry for the wait, point for unexpected hiatus!**

**Disclaimed.**

The first thing Lavi did the next day was sneak into Kanda's room, he was still sleeping. But he quickly found what he was after, the clay. Kanda had obviously done something from it, but from Lavi's current viewpoint, he couldn't tell what is was. He tip-toed forward, wincing as he slipped and had to grab the cupboard for some support. He cursed his own self-clumsiness and gently grabbed the clay from the table, careful not to leave and marks on it. Kanda rolled over and Lavi froze, he knew Kanda was a light sleeper. The Second Exorcist groggily opened one sleepy eye, but soon closed it again. Lavi sighed as quietly as he possibly could, and he completed his journey with the clay to his office.

Lavi looked at the sculpture and #!*% his head, he could make out a head, and maybe a leg or two, but the rest had been squashed beyond recognition. It looked like Kanda had made some sort of humanoid figure, but then squashed it. Looking closer, Lavi saw the faint imprint of a fist, confirming his suspicions. Lavi couldn't make out who it was, but this was the culprit who had done something to Kanda. If he found out who, and where, they were. Worse things were coming to them than punching a clay sculpture. Yes, worse things.

Lavi turned his office door knob, only to find the door left open, he opened all the way and reeled back in surprise.

"Rebecca!" Lavi yelled.

Rebecca was standing in the middle of the room, staring at something in her hands. Lavi moved his body all the way through the door and straightened his exorcist uniform.

"Reb-" Lavi started, but Rebecca cut him off.

"Where did you get this?" she asked, holding out the letter stamp Lavi had taken off Kanda when they were sorting out Akuma objects.

"It came through the Akuma, but why are you-"

"Lavi," Rebecca said quietly, her voice serious, "Kanda has a..." she gulped, "These exact words, in his skin-"

"You don't mean..." Lavi trailed off. Rebecca nodded. Lavi's face turned paler and he clenched his fists. "They branded him," he said harshly. He turned on his heel, and wrenched open the door, not sure where he was going, but knowing he needed to take out his anger on something, someone, and Rebecca shouldn't have to be that person.

A tentative hand touched his arm, pulling him back. Lavi held his breath and tried to stop the red haze of anger taking him over.

"Lavi! Keep calm!" Rebecca said.

"I know, I know. I am," Lavi gritted his teeth, "I need to do something, anything,"

Rebecca was silent for a while. After a while she spoke up, "How about we go and make him a cup of coffee?"

Lavi just nodded, and together they made their way to the kitchen, the stamp lying on the desk-put aside, but definitely not forgotten.

A few minutes later, Lavi was back on his way to Kanda's room with a steaming cup of coffee, no milk, but plenty of sugar. He knocked on the door slightly before he came in, in case Kanda was awake.

"Morning, Yuu," He said, keeping his tone level. The Second Exorcist opened his eyes with a snap, the sudden act startling Lavi a bit. He turned around, and something in his eyes softened.

"They never used to do that," Kanda said so quietly Lavi wasn't sure if he was meant to hear it. Lavi resisted the urge to break into a giant smile. Kanda had just told him something! Of his own free will!

"Here, Yuu," Lavi handed Kanda the coffee, "I know you don't like sugar, but it should help protect your throat,"

Kanda took it, glancing weirdly at the idea of having sugar, Lavi suppressed a laugh. He was acting like a child being introduced to something new! Ha!

Kanda shuffled over on the bed a little, and Lavi took the invitation to sit down. At first Kanda leaned away from Lavi a little, but then moved closer, Lavi could feel his cold skin centimeters away from his side.

There was silence other than disgusted groans from Kanda. Lavi didn't start a conversation, it was a comfortable silence.

Then a huge bang, Lavi heard Lenalee shouting, "Akuma!"

Lavi started to get up and walked out of the room, he turned to Kanda and said, "Stay here,"

Kanda shook his head in a form of 'No', and began to follow Lavi.

Lavi sighed, and they ran to the scene of the akuma.

It was probably the most akuma anyone had ever seen, the skies were thick with them and the ground had a leading row of Level 2s. Which is the highest level they knew of at that moment.

"Oh snap," Lavi breathed.

"He belongs to M.E." a Level 2 pointed to Kanda.

"No," Lenalee frowned, "He belongs to himself!"

"HE BELONGS TO M.E."

"What'd you do to piss them off this time, Yuu?"

Lavi got no reply, he sighed, _Please say this isn't going to effect our progress in anyway._

Lavi took up his hammer, Lenalee prepared to kick, and Kanda reached out stiffly to grab Mugen.

"BEGIN!" Lavi shouted like a professional coach.

The fighting lasted for hours, they managed to drive of the akuma, though.

Lavi re-gathered his troop of Lenalee, Eric, Rebecca, and Hikaru and face Kanda.

He was sitting in a corner, curled in on himself in attempt to make himself look small, his hands covered his head. He was hyperventilating.

"Oh, snap," Eric said.

**A.N. Review!**


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